An Open Invitation to Scrap Your 2019 Goals
In my last post, I shared what I call my breakdown in self-care. Here’s a quick recap of what happened:
At the beginning of the year, I made the commitment to run the Spartan Ultra Beast race on April 27th. And as it turns out, there are numerous reasons why I decided to back off of the April race. I injured myself during my training, I was really not feeling fit enough, and overall, I simply didn’t allow myself enough time to properly prepare and train for this intense race.
After my recent half marathon experience, in a moment of self-reflection, I realized the most important reason to scrap the April race was this: I was just “doing it”, going through the motions, checking the boxes, with no true presence. And I was really doing all of these things for external reasons. As I looked deeper, I realized in all of my doing, I was completely ignoring myself. And, I knew it was time for a reinvention.
Reinvention in the Making
As I reconsidered my commitments, I asked myself a few questions. What do I want to create? What’s missing for me?
And the answer came: fun and play! In all of my efforts to train for the race, it all somehow became very serious. I noticed myself all caught up in the numbers. How many miles did I run? What was my time?
I was also very much in a scarcity mindset around the amount of time I had available for training and my overall level of fitness. I felt a lot of pressure. And all of this lead me to an old familiar thought cycle — thinking and feeling like I was not good enough. A negative thought for sure, yet oh so snuggly, cozy, and warm.
I coach my clients on this same issue, and yet I still get caught in old patterns. It’s normal. The difference for me these days is that I’m much quicker to recognize my old patterning when it comes up. When things feel off, I trust my intuition, I tune into those engrained familiar thoughts, and I get present to my old behaviors resurfacing. I know to check in with myself and revisit the reasons why I’m doing things in the first place.
From the start, my commitment was to run the race and document the training, the event and ultimately who I was “being” during the whole experience. I remain committed to sharing my personal insights in an authentic and raw way, and I do this with the intention of inspiring others to have breakthroughs for themselves. I’m also committed to putting my self-love project out there — sharing all of what’s going on with you.
My New Plan
So, here is what’s up, y’all!
I’m happy to share I have a huge new self-love project. I’m committed to bringing all aspects of it to my social media platforms. There are a number of things I’m letting go of in the process.
I am consciously choosing to put down force — to stop pushing — and pick up reverence — a space of deep respect for myself and my life. I’m done with all the doing just for the sake of it, going through the motions, checking boxes, and essentially walking around with a heavy (self-imposed) feeling of obligation. I’m committed to staying present and creating fun, play, and enjoyment for myself.
Here’s what my new self-love project looks like:
Approach my training in a different way. The training will still certainly be a challenge, and I plan to approach it with enjoyment. I’ll still be competing in the Spartan Ultra Beast race, just on a new date in the fall at a different location — either in South Carolina or Texas. And, I plan to make it more fun by turning in into a mini-vacation. I’ve completely revamped my training program too. I’m now doing the P90x2 training to increase my core strength, my overall conditioning, and because it’s a way for me to train that feels different and fun.
Focus on personal development. I’ve enrolled in a new leadership training program to improve my coaching. Right now I’m also really interested in Brene Brown’s work around shame, and I plan to delve deeper into this topic. I also signed up for Simon Sinek’s WHY Discovery Course to reconnect with my purpose. And, I’ll continue to bring in new books and courses to enhance my development.
Make time for creativity! Lately, I’ve noticed that I haven’t allowed myself much time for creative activities. Creating helps me access joy, presence, beauty, and love. A while back I started a project working with steel to sculpt a fish tank stand for my house. I’ve had this piece in the works for literally 18 months. I have recommitted to this project and plan to work on it a little bit each day, even if only for a few minutes.
Allow space to be. I am committed to providing myself the time and space to be still, quiet, and calm each day.
Find opportunities for connection and play. I’ve decided to join an adult men’s soccer league that I’ve played in previously. Although it’s physical activity, playing soccer just for fun will give me more pure “me” time where I can have fun and not feel the pressure of working toward a specific end goal or competition.
So why do I share all of this?
If you’re reading this, I’m guessing you agree that goals are important and very valuable. Yet, if your commitments are not working for you, if they start to feel out of integrity, it may be time to take a pause and change your approach. I’ve said it before and it’s my strong belief that we all need a do-over from time to time.
Consider this an invitation to look at your goals from the lens of something new. This doesn’t mean you have to have to scrap everything. (Remember, you make the rules.) This is a chance to check in with yourself, reevaluate, and replace beating yourself up with acceptance, kindness, and reinvention.
Do your goals and commitments need a make-over? Join me in this reinvention and let me support you. Sign up for a free Possibilities Conversation. I’ll walk you through the process I used to reevaluate my own goals and you’ll get clear on what’s most important to you. Click here to book a time on my calendar.